yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
