How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
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