It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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