Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Everclear isn't food dammit
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
