I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Sext me about skeletons
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize