it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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