I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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