nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
