You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
