can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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