I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
