oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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