What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
