Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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