how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
