Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
