I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
