but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
