I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
