belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize