Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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