it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize