i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Randomize