Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
