Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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