he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I am mentally ready for anal.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
