My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
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