Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
