Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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