Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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