Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
