Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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