so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
