id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
