All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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