Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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