i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize