she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i think my mom watched the whole time
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
being pregnant is like rehab
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize