guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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