Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
