I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
