Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
