We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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