I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
