is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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