That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize