apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
