Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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