party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
