The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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