I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
God I need to hump something, right now.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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